If You Are Losing Hope About Love

if you are losing hope about love

Is your heart broken?  Has your love life gone to crap? Do you simply feel like you are failing in your relationship or marriage?  Or that it is failing you?  In fact, are you finding it hard to believe in anything really working for you right now?  If you are losing hope about love, I know what it’s like—I’ve been there.

When you are disappointed, left, abandoned or hurt and cheated on, it absolutely feels like midnight of the soul. Things go dark, everything looks gray, and it can be hard to find happiness in anything. Sometimes you overeat, or find it hard to eat or stay asleep.

But I want you to know that this hopeless mood can be totally turned around.  And very quickly.  Even though it seems absolutely impossible for you!  Today I am sharing a new seven step mindset shift exercise that can change everything.  In fact, these seven steps can take you from disappointment, darkness, hopelessness or despair to new hope and possibilities.  And new happiness.  I use it myself and it works.  So let’s get started.

If You Are Losing Hope About Love Step One: Pick Out a Negative Thought that is Getting You Down.

So let’s look at some common self-defeating and self-sabotaging thoughts like: Nobody wants me; I’m unlovable;  I’ll never find love because there is something wrong with me; There are no good men/women on the dating apps; my husband/wife does not love me; I am going to be alone and lonely for the rest of my life.

If You Are Losing Hope About Love Step Two: Imagine Your Upset as a Dark Cloud

Imagine that the disappointment, upset or hopelessness that is connected with that thought is in the form of a dark cloud.  Close your eyes and in your mind picture the cloud.

If You Are Losing Hope About Love Step Three: Imagine the Cloud Expanding and Fading Away

Imagine that dark cloud expanding and dispersing.  Expanding and expanding out and getting thinner and thinner, lighter and lighter. Close your eyes and see the image fading as  it gets larger and larger

If You Are Losing Hope About Love Step Four:  Make the Cloud Larger and Larger

Imagine that the cloud is super thin and light as it expands to the size of your city…. your country…. the world.  Close your eyes and see it expanding there as it gets even thinner and thinner, lighter and lighter.

If You Are Losing Hope About Love Step Five: Take the Cloud Image Out into Space

So now imagine the cloud as big as the solar system…. the Milky Way…as big as the whole universe…. extending beyond the  known universe.  Close your eyes and take the image all the way into space.

If You Are Losing Hope About Love Step Six: Imagine You are an Observer in an Entirely Different Universe

Now, imagine you are in a different universe.  Look over at the cloud and say, You are only a fiction created by my thoughts. Disappear Now. Close your eyes and do this last step and watch the cloud turn into nothing.

If You Are Losing Hope About Love Step Seven: Make a New Affirmation.

At this point, I’d like you to create a positive self-affirmation like:  I see all the wonderful new possibilities for me.  I’m free of the past and joyful about the future.  I find a love and a life beyond my wildest dreams in a very surprising way.  With the Divine all things are possible for me.

So these are seven powerful steps to turn your hopelessness into hope!

If You are Losing Hope About Love: The Case of Anita

Anita, one of our coaching clients, was herself, a therapist in her late 40s.  She was enjoying a great relationship with a hottie she met on Tinder—who she saw as her true soulmate.  Unfortunately, after four months he ghosted her. Nada.  No text.  Nothing.  Not surprisingly, Anita fell apart emotionally; just sitting on the couch shoveling in the Krispy Kremes as she balled her eyes out.  She was in despair and hopelessness about ever finding love.  But luckily, she turned to us for coaching.

In fact, Anita’s coach had her do the Seven Step Mindset Shift Exercise to get rid of  key negative thoughts and beliefs she had.  For example, a prevalent hopeless-generating belief was that she was too old at age 50 to find love.   Of course, she was also worried about her attractiveness (or lack of it!).  Afraid of never finding love and ending up alone in a nursing home.  So each time she envisioned the negative mindset cloud that had to do with the negative thought, Anita learned how to expand it and make it disappear into nothing.  Next, she made a new affirmation from a new sense of personal freedom and hope.

Anita’s Affirmations.

So feel free to use them for yourself, if one resonates!

I’m now feeling a touch of heaven that leads me to love beyond my wildest dreams.

I’m in a surprisingly great, lasting  soulmate relationship with a great guy who completely cherishes me in forever love.

In silence I attract love today

I courageously stay the course for lasting love that makes me happy and fulfilled in every way.

I’m safe and trust that steady forever love is mine.

I’m happy to say Anita is so much happier and more hopeful now!  And she has gotten back out there and dating two very interesting guys!

So remember this exercise, use it and don’t quit before the miracle! But if you are losing hope about love and would like to discuss your unique situation with a professional, you can have a gift Breakthrough-to-Love session by phone, Zoom or Skype with one of my expert Love Mentor® coaches. I’m sure that you will get so much out of it.




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Are you a successful woman who is tired of having NO good men to date?  THIS  is for you!

Hi, I'm Dr. Diana Kirschner. My team and I have helped thousands of successful single women, including judges, famous shrinks, CEOs, philanthropists, Directors, professors, and celebrities like Hoda Kotb from The Today Show to find a high-quality man who understands, appreciates and cherishes them, and I'm confident we can help YOU too!

I'm a PBS Love expert and psychologist who has appeared on Oprah, the Today Show and in an Amazon Prime show, Love in 90 Days based on my bestseller Love in 90 Days.  My work has been featured in The New York Times and The Wall Street Journal, ABC, People, and NPR.

I specialize in helping high-caliber women create feminine self-confidence, dating success, and passionate love matches.

I want to do everything I can to give you hands-on personalized support that will make a lasting difference!

That's why I'm excited to offer a FREE Top-Tier Love Strategy Session via Zoom or phone with one of my gifted coaches.

During your powerful and dynamic one-on-one session, we will help you with your unique dating situation. You'll walk away refreshed and inspired, with a clear step-by-step path forward to move through any obstacles and get the top-tier love you want.  And deserve!

"I followed the program and enjoyed the process. I appreciate Dr. Diana planting very helpful seeds!"
-Hoda Kotb, The Today Show

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  1. David Fønsbo on October 20, 2021 at 8:52 am

    It’s a tough world we are living in. Women have gradually become more masculine and men more feminine. And relationships can’t really work in a ‘gender exchange.

    Nevertheless, I think it’s vital and maybe the only way to learn about the opposite sex. Integrating our femininity as men and our masculinity as women makes us more complete in a real way.

    I’m waiting for that integration to happen in a lot more people because I think this fundamentally will change relationships. We will have a much deeper understanding of each other.

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