8 Flirting Tips That Say You’re Interested

8 Flirting Tips That Say You're Interested

Eight Flirting Tips That Say You’re Interested

I get a lot of emails that ask me for flirting tips that show a man that you’re interested without being too obvious.  Here’s one from 48-year old Ellen in Phoenix: “I see Al at parties and he’s so attractive in a laid-back way.  We always talk and laugh, but he never asks me out.  How do I switch over from the buddy mode and show him I am interested?” 

Sometimes, as Ellen writes,  it’s hard to open the door with a guy who really interests you.  You become shy, wonder exactly what to do, if he is really interested, if you will be rejected and feel bad. You worry and wait and then the evening is over and nothing happens.  Home you go, alone with your disappointment. But there are some simple great flirting tips you can put into action to judge whether a terrific guy might be open to dating you. Flirting moves that give a clear green signal, an opening for him to ask you out. Of course, there are times when you just want to flirt regardless of whether you’re really interested or he’s interested. That’s OK too.

You can try one or more of these flirting tips and see what happens. And if you want to learn all of my flirting tips and how to bust through shyness be sure to read all the posts on flirting and watch the flirting tips videos.

Flirting is defined by a kind of teasing quality, where one offers, then takes the offer off the table, and then offers again. Flirting puts you in the great feminine/masculine dance.  To amp up your flirting, I want you to also dress yourself in line with an identity you create using an affirmation like I am sexy, beautiful and irresistibly attractive.

Eight Simple Flirting Tips to Try Out.

1.  Make warm eye contact

2. Smile and lick your lips

3.  Gently touch his arm

4.  Look him up and down,  look away, look back

5.  Touch your lips, neck or chest.

6.  Suggestively play with your hair, clothing or an object like a straw in a glass

7.  Whisper in his ear.

8.  If you know him already, give him a fun nickname

And remember, have fun with the guy.  Men love women who are fun to be with.

It’s Easy to Withdraw or Isolate

It is so easy to let yourself be quiet, shy or invisible with the ones you are really interested in.  It is easy to be in a rut, alone and LONELY, and yet not doing anything about it!!! Get yourself into action.  You do not want to be stuck in a net of inaction, a net that stops you from finding that COMPANIONSHIP, CARE, ROMANCE and SOULMATE LOVE that you really want.

Ask for Help

Ask for help if you can’t bust through shyness with attractive men.  There’s no shame in getting help in one of the most important areas of life. If you broke your arm you’d get help right? Well, if you’re tired of being alone or in disappointing relationships, be good to yourself and ask for help.

The best type of help is a Love Mentor, a person who you look up to, who is like a loving benefactor to you.  This is a person who gives you COURAGE to go beyond your fears.  A person who will help you figure out what to do and where to go, who will get you to TAKE ACTION, to get out there and do what you need to do to meet and attract the great guys.  This mentor might be an older family member, a twelve-step sponsor, a therapist or minister. Please make sure, however, that he or she has been successful in love.

Your mentor can give you constructive advice and real input about your dead-end dating patterns, your appearance and the people you date.  With that guidance, you will become very successful in dating and relationships.  Surprisingly successful!

Julie Gets Help for her Dead-End Dating Pattern

Here is an email from 50-year old Julie, who has been working with one of my skilled dating coaches . When Julie had her free session she wanted to know more about flirting with attractive men. Turns out she had a long-standing dead-end dating pattern of being a Hermit. Let’s hear from Julie after a few months of coaching:

“I had a great date last night. His name is John. He took me to a lovely restaurant right near my house. We must have been there for at least 3 hours. We had non-stop conversation. He lives in Chicago. John is an entrepreneur with 2 businesses. He is 6’2”. Plays tennis 2 hours a day. Skis Vermont and out west. Kite boards and windsurfs in the summer. Has two girls 5 and 7. Loves to cook, bikes in warmer weather, coaches soccer. I was so pleasantly surprised to find someone so accomplished living in my backyard. Smart and funny. He is out of town this week. Asked me for a date on Saturday but I already have a date with another guy for Saturday so we are planning on getting together on Sunday.

Sam, my date for Saturday, is very interesting. He also is self-employed owning a manufacturing business supplying the military electronics field. He is an avid outdoors man; rode horses all of his life. He lives in Lake Forest. And I met him at a dance competition. I am so thankful to my mentor!  I cannot tell you how nice it is to be meeting some new men.”

Julie is having the time of her life and you (yes, you!) can too. And don’t forget to check out our library of articles on flirting tips including how to flirt with a shy guy.


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Are you a successful woman who is tired of having NO good men to date?  THIS  is for you!

Hi, I'm Dr. Diana Kirschner. My team and I have helped thousands of successful single women, including judges, famous shrinks, CEOs, philanthropists, Directors, professors, and celebrities like Hoda Kotb from The Today Show to find a high-quality man who understands, appreciates and cherishes them, and I'm confident we can help YOU too!

I'm a PBS Love expert and psychologist who has appeared on Oprah, the Today Show and in an Amazon Prime show, Love in 90 Days based on my bestseller Love in 90 Days.  My work has been featured in The New York Times and The Wall Street Journal, ABC, People, and NPR.

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  1. Sammy on July 1, 2013 at 10:44 am

    Some classic flirting tips in this post…good luck to Ellen, I hope they help her out!

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