Five Harsh Facts Of Long Distance Relationships

harsh facts of long distance relationships
The harsh facts of long distance relationships can be emotionally draining and challenging to overcome. Yet, despite their complexity, about 14 million couples in the U.S. say they live at least 100 miles or more apart from their partners. In this post, we’ll explore five reasons that contribute to a 40% break-up rate within an average of 5 months apart. In addition, we’ll also present a case study of one such couple that through coaching were able to weather the storm of separation.

The Harsh Facts of Long Distance Relationships: Significant Effort Required

Long distance relationships require more communication and more planning than other relationships. This means that partners in long distance relationships need to make a conscious effort to keep their connection strong, which can be difficult when they’re physically apart. Communication is key, so partners should make an effort to stay in touch frequently through phone calls, video chats, Zoom/Skype and text messages. It’s also important to establish clear expectations and boundaries, such as how often to visit each other. For example, the couples that break up within 5 months of being apart, are those that make little to no effort to communicate frequently.

The Harsh Facts of Long Distance Relationships: They Can Become Expensive

Another harsh fact of long distance relationships is that they can be expensive. The cost of travel, phone bills, and other expenses can add up quickly. According to a survey by the dating app Badoo, people in long distance relationships spend an average of $111 per month on travel alone. This financial burden can create additional stress and tension in the relationship especially if one of the partners is in school or struggling financially.

The Harsh Facts of Long Distance Relationships: Very Difficult for New Couples

Long distance relationships can be particularly difficult for couples who are just starting out. Without a strong foundation of trust and a ton of bonding, new couples are very vulnerable to break-ups.

The Harsh Facts of Long Distance Relationships: They’re Draining Emotionally

Another harsh reality of long distance relationships is that they can be emotionally draining. Not being able to see your partner on a regular basis can lead to feelings of loneliness, isolation, and frustration. In some cases, long distance relationships can even lead to depression and anxiety.

The Harsh Facts of Long Distance Relationships: No Clear End in Sight

Finally, long distance relationships can be particularly challenging when there is no clear end date in sight. In our experience, couples that are apart and have yet to define a clear end point to the separation, are more likely to fail. For example, couples that plan on moving in together, engagement or other forms of commitment are more likely to succeed when there is a specific end date in mind. Without a clear end goal, it can be difficult to stay motivated and committed to the relationship.

The Harsh Facts of Long Distance Relationships: Ellie and Tom Overcome Their Separation

Ellie and Tom are in a long distance relationship. They live and work in different cities and only see each other every few months. Ellie is struggling with the emotional strain of being apart from Tom, and she’s feeling lonely and isolated.

To deal with the emotional strain of the distance, Sarah also talks to one of our expert coaches who specializes in long distance relationships. Through coaching, Ellie learns coping strategies to manage her emotions during the times when she’s feeling lonely or sad. For example, her coach suggests meditation and encourages her to join a group where she can practice with others.

Ellie also decides to take up a new hobby – painting. She spends her evenings creating beautiful paintings and sharing them with Tom over video chats and Zoom. Tom is impressed by her talent and encourages her to keep painting. He surprises her by flying in for a weekend so that he can see her studio and take her to her favorite museum. And they also make time for plenty of kissing and making love.

Tom also talks to Ellie’s coach to get guidance. She encourages him to stay connected by scheduling regular phone calls and video chats (at least 5 times per week). Tom makes a real effort to save money for travel expenses.

Despite the challenges of their long distance relationship, the couple reunites after 6 months apart and move in together. They are now happily married.


In conclusion, while long distance relationships can be rewarding and fulfilling, they also come with their fair share of challenges. Couples living apart, must prepare to put in extra effort, deal with financial burdens, and navigate emotional ups and downs. With the right mindset, commitment, and support, however, long distance relationships can succeed and even thrive.

find mr. right this year
  • This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged.

Sign up here for a powerful gift!

FREE Top-Tier Love Strategy Session!

Limited time offer

This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged.


Are you a successful woman who is tired of having NO good men to date?  THIS  is for you!

Hi, I'm Dr. Diana Kirschner. My team and I have helped thousands of successful single women, including judges, famous shrinks, CEOs, philanthropists, Directors, professors, and celebrities like Hoda Kotb from The Today Show to find a high-quality man who understands, appreciates and cherishes them, and I'm confident we can help YOU too!

I'm a PBS Love expert and psychologist who has appeared on Oprah, the Today Show and in an Amazon Prime show, Love in 90 Days based on my bestseller Love in 90 Days.  My work has been featured in The New York Times and The Wall Street Journal, ABC, People, and NPR.

I specialize in helping high-caliber women create feminine self-confidence, dating success, and passionate love matches.

I want to do everything I can to give you hands-on personalized support that will make a lasting difference!

That's why I'm excited to offer a FREE Top-Tier Love Strategy Session via Zoom or phone with one of my gifted coaches.

During your powerful and dynamic one-on-one session, we will help you with your unique dating situation. You'll walk away refreshed and inspired, with a clear step-by-step path forward to move through any obstacles and get the top-tier love you want.  And deserve!

"I followed the program and enjoyed the process. I appreciate Dr. Diana planting very helpful seeds!"
-Hoda Kotb, The Today Show

Here's what women like you are saying:

"My love strategy session helped me to meet a really high-caliber guy!  In it I learned how to tweak my profile to attract great matches.  And my boyfriend is the best!  We are having a blast building our dream house and planning for a cruise to Tahiti ! -Darla, Psychologist & Author

matchmaker, dating coach, dating tips, dating & relationship advice"I was fifty-two years old with a career that was enviably successful. But my love life was not. And I couldn't figure out why. As my love mentor, Diana helped me understand that I not only deserved to have but could have a strong, loving life partner who would always be there for me.  I found true love in three months! And after 4 plus years of marriage, my husband and I still pinch ourselves every day to make sure that it's not a dream!" - Midge Woolsey, PBS Pledge Host


  1. Andy on May 8, 2023 at 5:13 am

    Enjoyed reading this relatable post. Long distance dating is quite challenging, and if two people aren’t on the same page, it’s all the more difficult. I’ve found it detracts from one’s ability to live in the present as well in addition to your points. There needs to be an end game.

Leave a Comment