Dearest Friends,

This is it!!!  The exciting Launch for my new book, Sealing the Deal: The Love Mentor’s Guide to Lasting Love!  This book has such a powerful love-life impact that 14 self-help gurus and luminaries from Dr. Christiane Northrup to Arielle Ford are raving about it.  And today it comes with hundreds of dollars in free bonus gifts.

      John Gray, himself, puts it this way:  “Dr. Diana understands the mysteries of committed passionate love. There’s nothing like hearing it from a pro who walks the talk and even shares her own personal journey.  Follow Dr. Diana’s lasting love program and you’ll go from casual to committed and deliriously-in-love.”

      Learn how to deepen any relationship—if you have been dating two months, on & off for 10 years, married, or in any relationship where you feel uncertain or afraid that it is ending.  Even if your partner has cheated.  Sealing the Deal shows you exactly how to handle your love problems and create a deeply fulfilling relationship–your own happiest-ever-after.  

      Now it is possible AT ANY AGE to feel chosen, secure, cherished and appreciated by The One you really want.  To transform a painful relationship and the anxiety of an unknown romantic future into a committed “forever” love.  

To get the book NOW, along with many amazing free gifts click here: http://tinyurl.com/4heo8nm 

WHAT CAN SEALING THE DEAL DO FOR YOU? 

• Create irresistible attraction at any age & create an atmosphere that men love to be around.
• Empower your Diamond Self identity to attract and solidify the love you really want
• Use the single most important thing you can do to get a sincere commitment from the guy you want
• Keep that crazy-in-love feeling going, no matter how long you’ve been together.
• Avoid common mistakes women make that escalate conflict and drive their partners away
• Know when to have “the talk” Don’t think it matters when you bring it up? Think again.
• Get your relationship back and better than ever, even if he has cheated.

      In this COMPREHENSIVE, STEP-BY-STEP guide I will introduce you to dozens of women of ALL AGES who have found the lasting love that is their heart’s calling.  Buy Sealing the Deal TODAY and receive INSTANT free gifts to get you started RIGHT NOW building a lifetime of passionate lasting love: 3 E-Reports and two hour-long interviews in which I reveal personal secrets & simple can’t-miss tips of relationship success & a special URL with exclusive relationship advice for over 40’s. Plus:

• A book & audio excerpt on The Secret Pleasures of Menopause from Dr. Christiane Northrup
• Are You Ready to Meet Your Soulmate? Seven Soulmate Secrets Revealed in a mini-media ebook from Arielle Ford
• The 5 Massive Mistakes You’re Making in Your Love Life—and How to Turn Them Around Instantly!  The E-report from Evan Marc Katz
• Lesson on Combating Emotional Vampires from Dr. Judith Orloff
• Three e-books: Men are Like Fish: What Every Woman Needs to Know About Catching a Man; Dating Rocks! The 21 Smartest Moves Women Make for Love, & Talk Like a Winner! 21 Simple Rules for Achieving Everyday Communication Success from dating & relationship expert Steve Nakamoto
• A Natural Non-surgical Eye Lift to Keep You Looking Younger from Facial Magic’s Cynthia Rowland

And many more awesome gifts from world famous relationship and self help experts!

       You will receive over 30 FREE bonuses that are like your own personal course on healthy loving and living– all for the cost of one book.  But they are available for a limited time only.

So if you want True Love in 2011, take action now.

Click on: http://tinyurl.com/4heo8nm

Wishing you love,

Dr. Diana

Diana Kirschner, Ph.D. is a frequent guest psychologist on The Today Show & author of the highly acclaimed new book, “Sealing the Deal: The Love Mentor’s Guide to Lasting Love” as well as the best-selling author of “Love in 90 Days.” Dr. Diana’s revolutionary work is the basis of her PBS Special on love. Connect with Dr. Diana through her FREE Relationship and Dating Advice Newsletter 

“A soul mate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for who we’re pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other.”  Richard Bach

A question that I’ve been asked a lot is: “How can I tell if he’s my soul mate?” Followed by, “Can you really know for sure?” I have a whole chapter in my new relationship advice book, Sealing the Deal: The Love Mentor’s Guide to Lasting Love, loaded with checklists and quizzes to help you figure out whether your partner truly is the One.  Here, hot off the press, are a few highlights on the soul mate question, adapted from that chapter.

Maybe you also believe that there is a soul mate out there for you. If you said yes, you’re not alone. Studies have shown that more than 90 percent of young adults believe in the concept, and 88 percent believe that destiny has determined that there is one and only one person who is your soul mate.

Amazing, considering that the idea is thousands of years old. In The Symposium, Plato described the soul mate as the person’s “other half” that has been split from him. The quest of life is to find that missing half, that twin flame. The theme has been exploited in movies like The Butcher’s Wife, The Time Traveler’s Wife, and City of Angels. Other views of soul mates include reincarnation and that the person is someone with whom we have shared other lives. The movie What Dreams May Come beautifully explored the profound connection that may continue after the death of one’s Beloved.

But the soul mate idea also carries with it the belief that a perfect person exists for us; if only we could find him or her, then love and life would be easy. This last belief has gotten people into a lot of trouble, especially in the area of commitment. By insisting on finding a perfect partner, many women have walked away from really great potential partners. Why? Because something was missing. Maybe it was chemistry, or maybe he didn’t match her ideal of the One, and so on. So they’ve ended up alone, still looking for that perfect soul mate. No wonder, then, that the renowned family psychiatrist Frank Pittman once said, “Nothing has produced more unhappiness than the concept of the soul mate.”

So what does science have to say about all this? Psychologists have found that people fall into two groups on the question of what makes for a successful relationship: Group one believes it’s based primarily on finding the “right person” (soul mate); while group two believes in the “work at it consistently” approach to lasting love. The soul mate group believes that choosing the right person helps overcome most of the problems that love throws our way. And if it doesn’t go so easy, we must have picked the wrong person. Therefore, on to the next partner. The “work at it” group believes that there are no perfect princes or princesses and that we are all works in progress. Therefore, a lasting love relationship is never an easy process, and we shouldn’t ever expect that.

Having been a psychologist for more than twenty-five years, and married to one man for the same long stretch, I can tell you that there are no perfect partners out there. Not me. Not my husband. Not any of my many clients, mentees, friends, or family members. Lasting love is a hard-won battle of personal discipline, compromise, dedication, and commitment.

But neither is everyone a good match for us. For example, there is research about scent and other physical traits playing roles in sexual attraction or desire. Other research shows that those who are of similar educational levels are more compatible. Therefore, while the one-perfect-person idea can lead to a long road of disappointment, there are certainly better and worse matches for us. If we are with a more compatible person, we are more likely to have the experience of being with the One who is a soul mate.

Chances are very good that there is more than one person—in fact several “Ones”—who could fit the bill for you. And all of them are less than perfect. But if there are no perfect partners, how can you know whether your current partner can fit the bill as a soul mate? Here are eleven relationship markers to help you know to what degree he is one of the Ones:

1.      When you’re with him you feel like you’ve come home.

2.      You feel like your partnership was meant to be; as if kissed by destiny.

3.      In your communication with each other, there is a rapid “knowing” of what each of you means.

4.      You have a shared mission in life, perhaps a cause, a career, or the creation of a family.

5.      When you’re together, the world seems like a better place.

6.      Your mood is elevated when you’re together. It’s not necessarily passion or excitement, although that’s there, too, at times.

7.      When you look at him, you see a part of yourself that’s been missing. Perhaps it’s his assertiveness or joy of adventure. But it’s something that, when added to your life, makes you feel more complete.

8.      Being together makes you more hopeful about the future you are creating.

9.      You can be more authentic and fully yourself around your partner.

10.  Being together makes each of you work harder on overcoming bad habits and becoming more loving people.

11.  These special qualities of connection are growing over time, not disappearing completely or diminishing.

Don’t worry if you don’t feel all eleven of these things happening when you’re with your partner. That’s where the imperfection comes in—either in you or in your partner. If you are experiencing six or more of these markers, chances are you are matched well. Over time you can work toward having all eleven of these soul mate qualities.

Bottom line: There are probably a number of guys who could click with you in a magical way as your soul mate. But if you are experiencing some magical moments of communion with your boyfriend, he could be the One of Ones. The connection usually happens in a variety of different ways. So stay open! To learn much more about soul mate connection, understanding the minds of men, and how to create commitment and lasting passionate love, pick up a copy of Sealing the Deal: The Love Mentor’s Guide to Lasting Love.  Simply buy your copy online or at a bookstore and then fill in your purchase info at http://www.lovein90days.com/your-bonus-gifts/ and you will instantly get many wonderful free bonus gifts from my friends, Arielle Ford, Dr. Christiane Northrup and other self-help and relationship experts.  Oh, and of course, I have some special gifts for you as well.

Wishing you love,

Dr. Diana

Diana Kirschner, Ph.D. is a frequent guest psychologist on The Today Show & author of the highly acclaimed new relationship advice book, “Sealing the Deal: The Love Mentor’s Guide to Lasting Love” as well as the best-selling dating advice book, “Love in 90 Days.” Dr. Diana’s revolutionary work is the basis of her PBS Special on love. Connect with Dr. Diana through her FREE Relationship and Dating Advice Newsletter.

In this blog we continue with Part 2 of online dating success for those of you women over 40. Part 1 covered the importance of the photo in great detail.  Today, you’ll learn five more dating advice secrets that have helped many over 40s, over 50s and over 60s women find real lasting partners on line. They are: how to create the perfect, screenname, headline and profile; how to describe your ideal match; which sites to sign up for; and how to use search engine secrets to optimize your chances of being seen by many more guys.

1. Your Screenname, Headline and Profile Need to Pop

 To differentiate yourself from all the other women out there, your screenname, headline and profile have to be real, upbeat and clever representations of who you are.   First, sign on to one of the larger online sites that has plenty of boomer aged-men like Match, eHarmony and PlentyOfFish.com as a male looking for a female and jot down ideas.  Ideally do this exercise with a male friend to help you see what guys are looking for.  Next, ask each of your two best friends to write up a one paragraph description of you, highlighting your unique and wonderful qualities.  Now you are ready to put together an optimal screenname and profile that is 100% you and stands out.     Sizzlin’ Screennames:

    Screennames like BubblyBrit; RioGirlinNYC; RareYetWellDone all pop.  They give guys a vivid picture of your personality. Try variations on these examples, or other positive and creative examples you can see by logging on to a major site as a guy looking for a woman. You can also appeal to men’s interests in a clever way. FootballSeasonistheBestTimeofYear; ILuvEntrepreneurs; or MatchPointMatch will catch the eye of a guy who shares your interests.  Similarly, you can create screennames that appeal to golfers, baseball enthusiasts, lawyers, doctors, sudoku-players or any other hobby or interest.

 Screenname Don’ts:

    Avoid defensive, kooky or negative monikers, like IHaveaKidIWillAlwaysLove; OrangePolkaDots; or LuckyLies. And please avoid anything to do with eye-color, being “sweet” or any of the other trite and boring names or headlines you see over and over.

 The Perfect Headline and Profile  

      For your Headline, write a sentence that showcases you and basically restates your love intention, but phrased in the third person. 

Warm, witty, wonderful woman now looking for her special guy. 

Foxy, fun-loving redhead seeks her mate. 

Caring, kind Southern girl looking for a great partner.  

Avoid simply restating what you put in your screenname or indicating that you are fun and ready for a good time (that will only get you a crop of guys who are not interested in a relationship).

      For the Profile, start by working from your friends’ write-ups (see Part 1).  Be honest and lead with your most inviting qualities. Are you funny?  A people person?  Do you have a quick mind?  Are you creative?  Write about it.  Then throw in some quirky, endearing or funny specifics.  For example you can say that you are a Sunday New York Times crossword puzzle person or love music from the 80’s. List your interests that men would be likely to share.  For example, you might mention hiking with the Sierra club, wine dinners or your favorite sports team.  Barbara, a people-person realtor writes:

I have that approachable quality where people think I’m someone they know.  I’m a fiercely loyal friend and a good listener who loves storytellers.  I also love the thrill of the deal, am pretty handy in the kitchen and a great speller. I love peanut butter & jelly sandwiches, baseball games, stand-up comics, kissing and spur-of-the-moment road trips.

2. Less is More When It Comes to Describing Your Ideal Match

      When you write about an ideal match, make it short and general. Less is more—you don’t want the man feeling like he can’t measure up to a long list of qualities.  Also, remember that you are going to be filling your Dating Program of Three dance card, which will include guys who at first are “not really your type.”  Something like the following works fine: Looking for a good-hearted, successful man who wants a committed relationship with his best friend and lover.  You want to cast a wide net to capture men who are interested and then do the picking and choosing. When you do start sorting through your responses, then you can choose men whose profiles indicate that they are in the correct age range, successful and looking for a long-term relationship and children, if you want them. 

3. Work a Larger Site and a Boutique Site

      I would like you to be a paid subscriber on two: one large one, such as Match, eHarmony, or PlentyOfFish.com, and one specialized site like JDate.com, Christianmingle.com or Blacksingles.com.  Browse through different sites, reading the profiles.  Go with your intuition in picking a site. According to independent sources, there are currently thirty million unique visitors per month at U.S. dating sites.  And millions more per month in the U.K. and Europe.  So there are plenty of people from whom to select.

4. Master the Search Engine Secrets that Get More Results

      A highly ranked profile can increase your visibility and generate more responses. When men run a search for women, and you meet the criteria, you will land at the top of their search results, ahead of other women, just by following some simple rules. On a number of sites, recently updated profiles are ranked higher.  You don’t have to do much to qualify. You can just tweak your info, changing your ideal first date or hobby frequently.  On some sites, you will come up as “New” all over again if you simply delete a sentence in your profile and then replace it.  Though these are easy ways to update your profile, it’s also a good idea to experiment with your photo, screenname and profile to see if making some changes pulls in better guys.

    There are many other secrets to making online dating sites produce top-quality guys for over 40s women!  If you really want to fast forward to your success online and learn all the simple secrets that have helped many Boomer women find the One quickly, then I have great news for you. My expert Love Mentors will teach you these easy-to-use strategies and help you develop photos, screennames and profiles that will make you stand out. And it’s included in my love mentoring package. Better yet, if you like, I will personally review your online presence at no extra cost. To introduce you to this service and for a limited time you can have a FREE 40-minute coaching session with an expert Love Mentor by phone or Skype.  If you really want to maximize the results of your online experience talk to one of my incredible Mentors. Each one has a long background in transformational work, is in a committed lasting love relationship (so they walk the talk) and is closely supervised by me.  Most importantly, each Mentor knows how to help you online and off-line so that you move forward to the love relationship you really want!

    The best news is that we can give you an introductory 40 minute one-on-one personalized session by phone or Skype for FREE.  Just click here or go to http://www.lovein90days.com/coaching/ to get your own personal FREE 40-minute session by phone or Skype ASAP.

Wishing you love,

Dr. Diana

Diana Kirschner, Ph.D. is a frequent guest psychologist on The Today Show & author of the highly acclaimed new book, “Sealing the Deal: The Love Mentor’s Guide to Lasting Love” as well as the best-selling author of “Love in 90 Days.” Dr. Diana’s revolutionary work is the basis of her PBS Special on love. Connect with Dr. Diana through her FREE Relationship and Dating Advice Newsletter 

This is it, you vow.  I am ready to have a real relationship.  With a nice guy.  A good guy.  Like Allen, from  your last job, who was crazy about you.  The guy who wanted to go out with you but you blew off –and now he is married with three cute little kids.  

You are done with players, elusive hotties, the ones who come on strong and disappear, cheaters and all-around heartbreakers.  You are sick of being disappointed, hurt, betrayed, furious and depressed.  Sick of lying on the couch with the remote and your cell while you go through a whole tissue box worth of tears. 

You know that choosing from this pool of nice types will save you a lot of wasted time with men who are not into you, scoundrels who betray you or narcissists who blame you for any and every problem.  You are ready for a partner who is your best friend.

 But there is one hitch:  You just don’t feel it with the nice guys.  No chemistry.  No tingle where it counts.  No adrenaline rush when he looks into your eyes. There is this one guy you met online, the paunchy one.  He is a great guy, successful, giving, crazy about you, and even has nice eyes, you think.  But there is no spark.  Are you doomed because of some weird neurological wiring and biochemistry to only be drawn to those you can’t have?

Answer: No you’re not.  I’ve worked with many women who complained of the same dilemma. And now they are married to great guys.  What’s their secret?  Here are six relationship tips from my new book, Sealing the Deal: The Love Mentor’s Guide to Lasting Love that you can use to join the lucky ranks of women who overcame their initial lack of attraction and fell in love with terrific guys.

1.  1. Remember to give him a real chance. Even if he is balding, paunchy, nerdy, or is not particularly attractive.  In fact, you want to date against type.    Be honest with yourself: Has dating your type gotten you anywhere?  Even if you are not exactly blown away on the first date, remember to stay open.  Go for at least a second or third date.  You cannot know what secret goodies are hidden in someone just by meeting them once.  You have to let a potential partner unfold and show you his different sides.  If there is any connection with this person at all, give it another chance. Chemistry can happen in a heartbeat.
2. Practice my Opening Possibility Exercises Now (OPEN.)    If a guy seems crazy about you, is willing to grow, and is a good guy–use my OPEN Techniques to see what may be there.  First, think of him as a present wrapped in nested boxes.  As you interact, you are unwrapping the present and finding out more and more things about him that may be wonderful.  This process often leads to marvelous chemistry and connection!
3. Use affirmations before each date.  I have fun with this man.  I see the hidden possibilities in (his name).  This man is a present for my enjoyment. More will be revealed about this person.  I uncover and enjoy the wonderful aspects of this man.  I find chemistry with (his name). 
4. Go on dates that are exciting, novel and get the adrenaline pumping.  Novel experiences can stimulate adrenaline and give you a rush while exciting dates produce dopamine, the brain chemical of love. Go on a roller coaster at the amusement park, rock climbing at your gym, take a helicopter ride, try hiking on a high, winding trail or wind-surfing, make a mad dash to catch sunset at the beach, scream yourselves silly at a football game or the racetrack.  Studies show that people who are emotionally aroused, whether by joy, fear, or any feeling, fall in love more easily.  As two love researchers once wrote, “Adrenaline makes the heart grow fonder.”
5. See him in his element.  Plan a date around skiing, a performance of his rock band, a wine-tasting event or whatever he excels at.  You will catch sides of him you haven’t seen before.  His personal power and charisma will be at their height and just may open up a host of juicy feelings.
6. Try turning yourself on first.  Go on a date wearing your sexiest lingerie under your clothes.  Flirt with him, get touchy-feely, whisper in his ear and maybe kiss him. 

If he suddenly comes back with some sensual moves, your ‘chemistry experiment’ may prove to be a sparkling success!  Remember, that love almost always comes in a surprise package; most people do not end up with the kind of person they imagine for themselves.  The woman who dates starving artists marries a rich, balding lawyer.  One of my love mentees who was deeply infatuated with a hot George Clooney look-alike (he was married) later created a gem of a marriage with a short plain guy who was her champion and a healing force of nature in her life.  So practice these six relationship tips and your love life will make a 180° turn.

Diana Kirschner, Ph.D. is a frequent guest psychologist on The Today Show & author of the highly acclaimed new relationship advice book, “Sealing the Deal: The Love Mentor’s Guide to Lasting Love” as well as the best-selling author of “Love in 90 Days.” Dr. Diana’s revolutionary work is the basis of her PBS Special on love. Connect with Dr. Diana through her FREE Relationship and Dating Advice Newsletter 

According to the US Census Bureau there are at least 92 million single Americans. High school and college alum groups and social networking sites like Facebook and Linkedin are bringing singles together online right and left. Online dating is booming–the Pew Internet & American Life Project’s online dating survey found that the majority of actively dating Americans have tried it. Latest independent research groups estimate that 30 million people visit online dating sites monthly and that’s just in the U.S.

Bottom line: your 2011 dating life could make a 180° turn—into being the best it has ever been! Truly, the chances of meeting the love of your life are better than ever! 2011 could be the year that you are happily, wildly in love.

So go on, make the affirmation. Something like, I create an exciting love relationship that is fulfilling in every way. Here is a three-step love advice action plan based on my new book, Sealing the Deal: The Love Mentor’s Guide to Lasting Love. These three simple steps can make your love affirmation a reality in 2011:  

1. Meet New People

Find and say hello to three new guys or women every day. Assuming you are in a safe or public place, make eye contact, smile, say ‘Hi’. Where you ask? Sign up for on-going classes/activities that interest you that have lots of potential partners in them—for example: finance, investing and business at your local college’s School of Continuing and Professional Studies; rock-climbing and golfing; snowboarding/skiing; hiking; and cigar tasting are great for meeting men. Women are plentiful at cooking, growth, spirituality or yoga courses. Coed city sports teams are great and usually have an even mix of genders. There are many other activities, classes and clubs to consider so search online on any topic plus the name of your city or town.

2. Work Your Online Dating Program

Throw out your old photo and profile. Have a friend who is a good photographer, make that a great photographer, take 100 headshots of you in order to get one that looks especially warm, attractive and inviting. Write up a fresh interesting profile with the help of any writer friends you have. After you post your new photo and profile, spend at least two-three hours a week looking around the site, sending and responding to messages and connecting by phone and in person with people. Block out time in your calendar to work the program.

3. Use Social Networking

Sign up for Facebook or any other social network and start making friends. If you are already on the sites, gather more friends. Make sure you indicate your relationship status is single. Chat folks up. Find old connections from the past. Look up lost loves and find out what they are up to. Lots of people are finding true love on these kinds of sites.

If you take these three dating tips to heart, chances are, by next New Year’s Eve you’ll be kissing the one you want.

And to make sure you will be, sign up for FREE ongoing support: You can learn EXACTLY how to Find, Attract and Date terrific guys and create Lasting Love that is just right for you by subscribing to my Dating Tips & Relationship Advice Newsletter, absolutely FREE! Just Click Here to get started now!

Wishing you great love in 2011!

xo

Dr. Diana

Diana Kirschner, Ph.D. is a frequent guest psychologist on The Today Show & author of  the newly published “Sealing the Deal: The Love Mentor’s Guide to Lasting Love” and the best-seller “Love in 90 Days” (dating advice book)”. Dr. Diana’s work is the basis of her PBS Special on love. Connect with Dr. Diana through her FREE relationship & dating advice newsletter.