Sex and the City 2 is just about to explode in the collective psyche of women everywhere. Tickets are already going like hotcakes. Why? . TCarrie, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda are character types many women can totally relate to. Their friendship is a soul mate bond, steadying each one, as they weave in and out of difficulties with men. Sex and the City 2 will reveal more of their adventures and misadventures together in the world of love.
The Sex & the City foursome are good examples of women who deal with four common self-sabotaging patterns that many real women struggle withhe four Deadly Dating patterns are Crumbs, Chase Me, Not Perfect-I’ll Pass and Safety Net. Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda transformed their patterns in order to develop or maintain love relationships. Their stories reflect the challenges and triumphs of real women as they navigate the rocky journey to lasting love.
Here are the four Deadly Dating Patterns from my book, Love in 90 Days and their all-important dynamics:
The Crumbs Deadly Dating Pattern (like Carrie)
- Accepting seductive & wonderful treatment from a guy who is ultimately out of reach & afraid of commitment. (Mr. Big) Carrie triumphs on this one!
- Fantasizing about & falling for men who put her second, behind work or other women (the Russian)
- Cheating on a man who really loved her (Aidan), pushing him away. (It looks like Aidan will be back in Sex & the City 2!!!)
Deeper Dynamic: Believing that you don’t deserve a relationship in which you come first.
The Chase Me Deadly Dating Pattern (like Samantha)
- Endlessly claiming she did not really want to have a relationship
- Leaving lovers & moving on for no apparent reason
- Fearing intimacy (Smith holding her hand in public!) and commitment
Deeper Dynamic: A desperate need to be claimed, almost against your will, (As Smith successfully did for a while with Samantha.)
The Not Perfect—I’ll Pass Deadly Dating Pattern (like Charlotte)
- Fussy and a perfectionist
- Almost passed on Harry Goldenblatt, a man who was good husband material but balding & unpolished. (refused to go to beach party with him unless he had his back waxed)
- Judgmental and constricted about sexuality
Deeper Dynamic: A self-critical nature where you judge anyone who would want you as “not good enough.”
The Safety Net Deadly Dating Pattern (like Miranda)
- Afraid of being alone & pessimistic about her odds of meeting a great guy
- Dating guys she feels are beneath her
- Attracted to a man only if other women are interested in him or he’s left her (Steve)
Deeper Dynamic: Low self esteem & a sense that you can’t compete with other women for a really great successful guy.
In the bestselling dating advice book, Love in 90 Days, you can read much more about each of these Deadly Dating Patterns and nine others that can seriously sabotage your love life. And, most importantly, how to escape from each one of them to create the love relationship you really want!
Wondering which type you are? You can take a special quiz and find out which Sex & the City Girl you are most like at http://www.MyDatingPatterns.com. It comes with a free customized bonus Report & Fix-It Kit for your Dating Type.
Wishing you love,
Dr. D
Dr. Diana Kirschner
♥ Relationship advice from my heart to yours ♥
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
I suggest that you study Love in 90 Days and in particular, the parts about how to break out of Deadly Dating Patterns! Best of luck and love!
I’ve never realized till you stated the character traits of the SITC women that I’m actually Miranda. It’s been 6 years since my divorce and all my dating has been with guys who ultimately bore or hurt me. Now I’ve met a truly exciting (though imperfect and gun-shy) man, and I’m worried I’ll screw it up. How do I stop being Miranda and give my all to this fragile beginning of something really good?