In Four Best Sex Secrets, Part 1, we talked about how two special sex secrets keep passion alive, no matter how long you have been together: 1) novelty, or changing things up so that you make love in new locations, new ways, with new sexy clothes, perfume or candles. These are so important to keeping your love life hot. And, 2) sexual trance, that state in which you are completely focused on yourself and your own pleasure for parts of your sex play. Now let’s look at the last two more sex secrets: Learning what works for your partner and discovering what works for you.
But before we do that I wanted to share this email I just got from Kate, a 41 year old film producer who wrote:
Before Kate went into Love Mentoring® I was barely able to enjoy sex. In fact it just didn’t matter–I was just looking for companionship with a guy. But when I met Avi and he started sweeping me off my feet with two dozen roses and intimate picnic dinners at sunset, I felt very differently. I was enormously attracted to him—in a way I’d never felt before–not even as a teenager. Our chemistry was searing, electrical–so much so that it actually scared me.
So as soon as we’d had been together a few months and became exclusive, I signed up for Love Mentoring® and asked for coaching about sex. I wanted to learn how to take this new awakening in my body, this sexy connection to its full expression. Well what’s happened for me and for us has been amazing.
Avi and I are coming up on one year together soon and we are so happy together. We rented a beautiful home in the countryside and are having the best time. Just wanted you to know I am living much more in the moment and loving life. No proposal yet, but I am in no rush. We are very committed to each other and have a fantastic emotional, mental and physical connection and the best sex life! I really learned about the importance of pleasure for myself and my partner from my Love Mentor. Avi and I seem to fall deeper in love every day. Thank you, Dr. Diana.
Kate’s expert dating coach taught her four special sex secrets and she was able to come alive romantically and sensually in a way she had never ever experienced. This blog deals with two of the sex secrets that Kate used.
Four Sex Secrets — The Love Mentor’s Guide Part 2
Sex Secrets – #3 Learn What Works for Your Partner
In order to learn what works for your partner, try touching, massaging, licking, or stimulating all the different parts of the body. Observe and ask questions about what feels good. What creates a hot vibe between you? It is all about the energy connection between you–don’t worry about your technique! Just play and experiment. Sometimes touching the inner parts of his thighs, or around his nipples may be very arousing. Try different sexual acts, variations of intercourse positions and oral sex. Most men adore oral sex. If this is a problem for you, you may be able to find a way that it works for you, ie, doing it while he is wearing a condom or just for a little while.
Sex Secrets – #4 Discover What Works for You
Ultimately you are responsible for knowing your body and creating the conditions for your own sexual pleasure. The best way to do this is by using what sex therapists call sensate focus. This simple but effective sex secret requires only that you be in an undisturbed place where you playfully touch and stimulate different parts of your body and learn about what sensations feel good to you. It’s best if you tease yourself but don’t reach climax. Learn how to arouse yourself first; the rest will come easier.
Sex Secrets #4 is: the more you know about your own body, the better your lover will be able to please you. Guide him or her by saying positive things like, “I love it when you stroke my breast gently.” Or “I would love you to use your magic mouth on my tummy and work your way down.” Or you can say, “That is wonderful! Could you stroke me a little (slower/faster/in a teasing way/ with lubricant/using your tongue, etc).” Be validating and then very very specific about what you want, when you want it and for how long. Your partner will be thrilled with how responsive you become to him and his touch. And you will be over-the-moon with pleasure and fulfillment..
You can learn much more about special sex secrets and creating passionate true love by having your own free 40 minute one-on-one Intro Love Mentoring® session by phone or Skype! You will get to talk to a handpicked dating coach who is caring, wise and so knowledgeable. These are the people I would turn to for love advice!!
Wishing you love,
“My Love Mentor pinpointed the exact reasons I didn’t have the love I wanted in my life with an arrow that led to their resolution. My mentoring sessions opened the doorway to true relationship happiness and self-esteem.” ~ Shelly, Denver