Online Dating for the Over 40s. Today’s guest blog is written by Ivana Vitali who writes relationship advice posts for eharmony.com in the U.K. I know you’ll enjoy it.
Finding love in your forties can be a very difficult experience, particularly for those who haven’t dated in a while. Other priorities and responsibilities fill up your life, and any possibility of meeting a potential match gets shoved into the background. Past relationships or failed marriages knock the confidence right out of you, and gradually you begin to forget how to approach people or how the very basics of dating etiquette work. If these situations sound familiar, now might be the time to tackle the problem head-on. Take action (join a gym, start a new hobby, or ask your friends to set you up with someone they know. Or, alternatively, you could sign up on a few dating sites. A larger one or any of the interesting niche sites that focus on religion, ethnicity or academic background.
These websites are particularly useful for the forty-plus age group, as you can browse for particularities, be directly matched for compatibility and meet your potential soul mate from the comfort of your own home. This method can also save an enormous amount of time, which is particularly important for you harassed businesswomen and rushed, doting mothers. If you do give this innovative way of dating a try, here are three dating tips to bear in mind:
Honesty is very important in online dating. It’s all very well putting up a profile picture that was actually taken ten years ago and pretending you regularly volunteer for Oxfam, but if you are serious about meeting someone, they will inevitably find out that you’ve been telling fibs – particularly if they relate to your age or appearance! This could then turn a promising new relationship very sour and you’ll have some uncomfortable explaining to do. It’s also important to lay down what you want from the relationship and reveal any big facts at the beginning – having children or an incomplete divorce, for example. It’s important to be direct and honest.
Embrace every possibility…
It’s easy to be picky on an online dating site. There are hundreds of profiles to browse through, after all. But this attitude can also be quite damaging – what if you don’t contact your soul mate because their profile picture is a bit blurry? The one problem with the web is that content can be interpreted in so many different ways that it often leads to misunderstandings. Therefore, abandon your fussiness, be open-minded and try a few things out. Try to at least talk to someone before you rule them out – especially if you have been matched for compatibility.
Use your wealth of wisdom…
Maturity is a definite advantage in the dating world. When you are online dating, use what you’ve learned from past mistakes and misjudgements to decide whether or not to pursue a match. By now, you should know what you like, so if you see a familiar pattern emerging when you’re dating someone, act on it. For example, if your date begins to exhibit similar characteristics to one of your particularly difficult exes, it might not be such a good idea to continue seeing them.
Online dating for the over 40s is challenging. But there are plenty of opportunities out there for finding relationships; just make sure you do it right!
Thank you, Ivana, for your wise words. And for all you boomers out there don’t forget to sign up for my ongoing support: You can learn EXACTLY how to date online successfully, how to flirt both on- and off-line and if you’re in a relationship, how to rekindle the passion by subscribing to my free Dating Tips & Relationship Advice Newsletter!
Wishing you love