I get alot of emails that ask me for flirting tips that show a man that you’re interested without being too obvious. Here’s one from 48-year old Ellen in Phoenix: “I see Al at parties and he’s so attractive in a laid-back way. We always talk and laugh, but he never asks me out. How do I switch over from the buddy mode and show him I am interested?”
Sometimes, as Ellen writes, it’s hard to open the door with a guy who really interests you. You become shy, wonder exactly what to do, if he is really interested, if you will be rejected and feel bad. You worry and wait and then the evening is over and nothing happens. Home you go, alone with your disappointment. But there are some simple great flirting tips you can put into action to judge whether a terrific guy might be open to dating you; flirting moves that give a clear green signal, an opening for him to ask you out. You can try one or more of these flirting tips and see what happens. And if you want to learn all of my flirting tips and how to bust through shyness be sure to sign up for my free Dating Tips and Relationship Advice Newsletter.
Flirting is defined by a kind of teasing quality, where one offers, then takes the offer off the table, and then offers again. Flirting puts you in the great feminine/masculine dance. To amp up your flirting, I want you to also dress yourself in line with an identity you create using an affirmation like I am sexy, beautiful and irresistibly attractive.
So here are 8 simple flirting tips to try out.
1. Make warm eye contact
2. Smile and lick your lips
3. Gently touch his arm
4. Look him up and down, look away, look back
5. Touch your lips, neck or chest.
6. Suggestively play with your hair, clothing or an object like a straw in a glass
7. Whisper in his ear.
8. If you know him already, give him a fun nickname
And remember, have fun with the guy. Men love women who are fun to be with.
It is so easy to let yourself be quiet, shy or invisible with the ones you are really interested in. It is easy to be in a rut, alone and LONELY, and yet not doing anything about it!!! Get yourself into action. You do not want to be stuck in a net of inaction, a net that stops you from finding that COMPANIONSHIP, CARE, ROMANCE and SOULMATE LOVE that you really want.
If you find that you’re stuck and not able to bust through shyness with the guys you’re attracted to, ask for help. There’s no shame in getting help in one of the most important areas of life. If you broke your arm you’d get help right? Well, if you’re tired of being alone or in disappointing relationships, be good to yourself and ask for help. The best type of help is a Love Mentor, a person who you look up to, who is like a loving benefactor to you. This is a person who gives you COURAGE to go beyond your fears. A person who will help you figure out what to do and where to go, who will get you to TAKE ACTION, to get out there and do what you need to do to meet and attract the great guys. This mentor might be an older family member, a twelve-step sponsor, a therapist or minister. Please make sure, however, that he or she has been successful in love.
Your mentor can give you constructive advice and real input about your dead-end dating patterns, your appearance and the people you date. With that guidance, you will become very successful in dating and relationships. Surprisingly successful!
If you don’t know anyone who fits the bill, I have good news for you! You can have a free 40-minute dating coaching session by phone or Skype to kick off your new love life. Contact me to arrange for your session with an expert dating coach.
Here is an email from 50-year old Julie, who has been working with one of my skilled Love Mentors and recently overcame a long- standing dead-end dating pattern of being a Hermit:
“I had a great date last night. His name is John. He took me to a lovely restaurant right near my house. We must have been there for at least 3 hours. We had non-stop conversation. He lives in Chicago. He is an entrepreneur. He owns 2 businesses. He is 6’2”. Plays tennis 2 hours a day. Skis Vermont and out west. Kiteboards and windsurfs in the summer. Has two girls 5 and 7. Loves to cook, bikes in warmer weather, coaches soccer. I was so pleasantly surprised to find someone so accomplished living in my backyard. Smart and funny. He is out of town this week. Asked me for a date on Saturday but I already have a date with another guy for Saturday so we are planning on getting together on Sunday.
Sam, my date for Saturday, is very interesting. He also is self-employed owning a manufacturing business supplying the military electronics field. He is an avid outdoorsman; rode horses all of his life. He lives in Lake Forest. And I met him at a dance competition. I am so thankful to my mentor! I cannot tell you how nice it is to be meeting some new men.”
Julie is having the time of her life and you (yes, you!) can too.
Wishing you love,