Best Five Tips for Coping with a Breakup

by Dr. Diana Kirschner on June 4, 2010

Five Tips for Coping with a Breakup

By Dr. Diana Kirschner

Being alone after a break up is a a true challenge.  Divorce or separation after a long relationship is the number two top life stressor following right behind being widowed. A severe loss can plunge you into depression and health problems.  So do not let yourself go for several months without taking steps to recover. A UCLA study showed that being rejected activates one of the same areas of the brain as physical pain!  The more ignored the people felt, the more activity they had in the anterior cingulate, which also registers physical distress. In other words, your pain is physiological. But research has also shown how you can recover from loss more quickly. Here are five tips that have helped many people turn this painful time into a whole new rebirth for themselves!

Tip 1. Spend Time with Close Friends
The same UCLA researchers found that spending time and sharing with close friends and offset the pain by causing the brain to release natural opioids, which are like the painkillers found in opium.

Tip 2. Use Anger As Fuel To Better Yourself
If you are feeling angry, channel it into kick boxing, lifting weights or cardio.  Exercise lifts your mood and youths your body. You will de-stress, find more peace and sleep better! Give yourself a makeover. Initially thinking about how sorry your ex will be when he or she sees how fantastic you have become can be fuel for your rebirth.   Make yourself more attractive and better inside and out.

Tip 3. Have A ‘New You’ Party
Invite your friends to come over for a ‘New You’ party where they help give you a makeover.  Let them go through your clothes and accessories, getting rid of unflattering stuff and putting together some hot looks for the new you.  Ask them for referrals to great hair salons or clothing shops. Find a look that makes you feel great.  You can also have a big reveal party for yourself.

Tip 4. Get Out There and Date Off- & Online
Start as soon as possible, even if you don’t feel like it.  The sooner you do, the sooner you’ll move on.  At this moment your chances of meeting the love of your life could be better than ever!  The average marriage now lasts under seven years and this means new singles are coming on the scene all the time. Around sixteen million people are now using online dating. You don’t need to worry about getting into a rebound relationship: new research shows that people marrying on the rebound are no more likely to fail than those who wait. Not to worry if you are older:  The American Association of Retired Persons found in a recent survey that 70 percent of single baby boomers are actively dating.

Tip 5. Meditation and Relaxation

Johns Hopkins researchers recommend practicing relaxation techniques to get rid of heartache. These include meditation, deep breathing or journaling out your feelings.  Practice any or all of these techniques and you will bounce back from loss more rapidly.

If you want one-on-one support during this difficult time, I want you to know that I just started a highly personalized Love Mentor coaching service. Now you can have coaching from a trained Love Mentor who has used Love in 90 Days principles to get and stay happily married.  Each one has a long background in transformational work and is closely supervised by me.  Most importantly, each Mentor is gifted and can help you move forward to the love relationship you really want!

The best news is, right now, as we kick off the Love Mentor Coaching we can give you an introductory 40 minute one-on-one personalized session by phone or Skype for FREE.  No strings attached.  Just go to www.lovein90days.com/contact/ to contact me and get your own personal FREE session by phone or Skype asap, because the time slots are filling up very fast.

Also: You can learn EXACTLY how to Find,  Attract and Date terrific guys and create Lasting Love that is just right for you by subscribing to my Dating Tips & Relationship Advice Newsletter, absolutely FREE!

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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

Mary April 24, 2010 at 2:53 pm

This website write-up presented me a whole load of ideas, thanks for sharing

Nick January 2, 2010 at 2:22 am

Thanks Diana, I hope this works for me…but I feel positive after reading this article.

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