Boomer Dating advice expert, Dr. Diana Kirschner, stars in Finding Your Own True Love, a PBS TV Special based on her bestselling dating advice book, Love in 90 Days. Dr. Diana inspires over 40 women (and men) with practical boomer dating tips plus relationship advice to help them bring more love into their lives.
Let’s face it: Boomer Dating is daunting. You might be coming out of a long-term marriage, or emerging from a period of time where you were consumed with raising children or caring for elderly parents — or, perhaps you still are responsible for children and/parents. Have your “dating muscles” atrophied? You might feel like you don’t have the slightest idea how to go about flirting, meeting the opposite sex, much less handling issues of sexually transmitted diseases. You might feel like your body is old or unattractive. Disrobing in front of a romantic partner? Definitely not.
Plus, today’s dating world doesn’t remotely resemble the one you knew. How proactive are women supposed to be? Is the third-date rule (for having sex) still in effect? Just how do you handle an HIV discussion? Is online dating reliable, safe, or even effective? And all these questions and difficulties are magnified for female Boomers, who outnumber their male counterparts and also have to compete with younger women.
Yet many Boomers, including women, have gone out there and had the fun and excitement of their teenage years all over again (and with the wisdom of the years, it’s even better!). A 54 year-old artist recently e-mailed me about her new Boomer boyfriend:
Joe adores me. He tells me I am a treasure, a rare beauty. I make him feel alive after so many years of being dead. Joe loves my voice, my thoughts, my work. He bought riding boots and we went riding together. His 95-year-old mom in Miami wants to see my photo.
If you are interested in a long-term relationship, then my boomer dating advice to you is this: See several people at once and hold off on the sex. The three-date rule, which says you need to have sex by the third date to show interest, no longer applies — you can take your time.
Once you take the boomer dating plunge, you may be very pleasantly surprised at the possibilities, especially in online dating. Women over 40 often report that once they start, they feel more confident, more clear about what they want and therefore, more attractive! Female Boomers are more empowered and more affluent than ever before. The good news is that often, younger women cannot compete with them for a male Boomer’s attention. The thirty-somethings are too active and demanding in terms of nightlife and other activities, whereas a Boomer man may prefer the seasoned wise companionship of a woman who has been there and done that. In other words, both male and female Boomers are in a position to pick and choose who they want to date. And there is plenty to pick and choose from. A recent survey showed that 70 percent of single Boomers actively date. Match.com indicates that the 50+ singles segment is its fastest-growing niche.
Here’s what Shirley, a 50-year-old divorcee who is in our Love Mentoring program writes:
I just met another amazing guy. This one actually was suggested by Match. I winked. He e-mailed. I e-mailed back. He called me and we had a fabulous conversation. He was so easy to talk to. He seemed honest and sincere. I asked some pretty blunt questions that he happily answered in good detail. And he’s tall! He created a business and sold it in a few years ago because he had plenty of money and wanted to do something else. On the other hand, Bill, the writer, is coming out this afternoon. We are going to the beach. Bill says that he has written a poem for me…
So, what are you waiting for? Join the party! And to help you on your boomer dating journey don’t forget, to take advantage of my free ongoing support. If you are over 40, you can learn all the boomer dating skills you need. Let me share my boomer dating secrets with you. Just subscribe to my FREE Dating Tips & Relationship Advice Newsletter.
Wishing you love,